Redneck Medical Terms
Benign - what you be, after you be eight.
Artery - the study of paintings.
Bacteria - back door to cafeteria.
Barium - what doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean section - a neighborhood in Rome.
Cat scan - searching for kitty.
Cauterize - made eye contact with her.
Coma - a punctuation mark.
D & C - where Washington is.
Dilate - to live long.
Enema - not a friend.
Fester - quicker than someone else.
Fibula - a small lie.
Genital - a non-Jewish person.
GI series - world series of military baseball.
Hangnail - what you hang your coat on.
Impotent - distinguished, well-known.
Labor pain - getting hurt at work.
Medical staff - a doctor’s cane.
Morbid - a higher offer.
Nitrates - cheaper than day rates.
Node - I knew it.
Outpatient - a person who has fainted.
Pap Smear - a fatherhood test.
Pelvis - second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative - a letter carrier.
Recovery room - place to do upholstery.
Rectum - darn near killed him.
Seizure - a Roman emperor.
Terminal Illness - getting sick at the airport.
Tumor - one plus one more
Urine - opposite of you’re out.
Varicose - nearby / close by.