Real 911 Calls
- Dispatcher:
- 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
- Caller:
- Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich.
- Dispatcher:
- Excuse me?
- Caller:
- I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
- Dispatcher:
- Was anything else taken?
- Caller:
- No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it.
- Dispatcher:
- 9-1-1 Fire or emergency?
- Caller:
- Fire, I guess.
- Dispatcher:
- How can I help you sir?
- Caller:
- I was wondering...does the Fire Dept. put snow chains on their trucks?
- Dispatcher:
- Yes sir, do you have an emergency?
- Caller:
- Well, I've spent the last 4 hours trying to put these chains on my tires and... well.. do you think the Fire Dept. could come over and help me?
- Dispatcher:
- Help you what?
- Caller:
- Help me get these chains on my car!
- Dispatcher:
- 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
- Caller:
- I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
- Dispatcher:
- This is nine eleven.
- Caller:
- I thought you just said it was nine-one-one.
- Dispatcher:
- Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
- Caller:
- Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.
- Dispatcher:
- 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
- Caller:
- My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart.
- Dispatcher:
- Is this her first child?
- Caller:
- No, you idiot! This is her husband!
And the winner is...
- Dispatcher:
- 9-1-1
- Caller:
- Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn...I think I'm going to pass out.
- Dispatcher:
- Sir, where are you calling from?
- Caller:
- I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster. Damn...
- Dispatcher:
- Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
- Caller:
- No.
- Dispatcher:
- What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
- Caller:
- Running from the Police.